First Words
by caress of shadows
Summary: Bonnie is mortified that one of her baby's first words is boob. Damon can't stop laughing. AU/AH


**AN: ** Hello dears. This is just a little one shot that came to me yesterday when my friend was reading me stuff off of Ifunny. Its just simple and cute. I hope you enjoy!

**AN2:** I'm still working on the next installment for V is for Vampire. Hopefully it will be up soon. Also, I'm thinking about writing a multi-chapter, I should be posting the first chapter shortly to kinda get a feel if peeps are gonna like it or not :)

**Disclaimer: **Don't own them, wish I did.

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**First Words**

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"Hey little man. Mommy has to go hang out with Aunt Elena cuz she's freaking out. Yes she is," Bonnie cooed to her grinning 18 month old baby.

Bonnie Salvatore laughed when Ian threw a handful of Cheerios at her. He looked so much like his father and he was beginning to act more like him every day. His pale blue eyes fairly sparkled when he heard his mommy's laughter.

"Hey big guy. You gonna get in trouble with daddy today?" A deep masculine voice asked as a pair of muscular arms slid around her waist.

"What kind of trouble, Damon?" Bonnie asked with an eye-roll.

"Oh ya know. I thought I'd get him a baby sized smoking pipe and drop him off at the strip club. You think they serve apple juice there?"

"Considering some of the things you've done in the past I almost wouldn't put it past you," Bonnie teased.

"You're one to talk." Damon walked around her to pull the squealing baby out of his high chair.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bonnie placed her hands on her hips. She couldn't wait to hear this.

"Ian, did you know that mommy used to let Uncle Jeremy touch her boobs?" Damon asked the little boy who was his spitting image, except for the lightly tanned tone of his skin.

"Good God, Damon! You can't talk like that. He's like a sponge. Yesterday he smacked Caroline's chest and yelled boob!" Bonnie informed him.

"Boob, boob, boob," Ian chortled proudly as if to show his parents what he learned.

Damon laughed so hard he had to give the baby to Bonnie. He was still laughing as he followed her into Ian's room to help get the baby ready. Bonnie wanted to punch her husband.

"Why was Elena freaking out?" Damon asked as Bonnie handed him a tiny pair of jeans and an adorable blue button down. The kid was dressing better than him.

"From what I can tell she's pregnant. Again..."

"God lord. How many is this? Four? Maybe we should get her and Stefan a mega sized box of condoms for Christmas."

"Well I'm headed over there now to remind her she can't dye her hair or eat sushi."

The family of three headed back downstairs and Damon placed the raven haired little boy in his playpen.

Damon pulled Bonnie against him and grasped her hips in his large hands. "I'm going to miss you today. Especially your boobs!"

Bonnie couldn't help but laugh against his firm mouth. Her laugh turned to a moan as Damon devoured her mouth.

"Damon, I have to go so quit tempting me." Bonnie reluctantly pulled away.

"Well I never." Damon looked at her in shock. "Our baby is wide awake."

Bonnie walked over and gave said baby a kiss goodbye.

"Mom," the baby squealed.

"That's me, bucko." Bonnie smiled down at her little angel.

"You can touch my boobs later tonight," She told her husband.

"Boob, boob, boob." Bonnie heard Ian repeat to her mortification followed by Damon's uncontrollable laughter. She ran out the door.

"Love you," she yelled at Damon.

"Love you back."

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Later that day Damon pushed Ian around in a cart at the local big box store, ignoring the stir they caused with the female patrons. Damon already knew he was exceedingly handsome and his baby was simply adorable. His wife was also the hottest woman on the planet. He'd even thought that when he and Bonnie hated each other. He had no time to spare for the women trying not so subtly to gain his attention.

Their cart was full of crap, but Damon was loaded so he'd buy whatever he wanted. Yes, he knew Ian was not old enough to ride a tricycle. Who cares? It was on special.

Damon was looking at the "As Seen on TV" items at the end of an isle. It was all crap. but Damon threw a Pillow Pet, a Topsy Turvey, and a Chillow in his cart anyways. No wonder Bonnie never let him go shopping alone. He thought with a smirk.

"Boob." Ian squealed with a point.

Damon of course looked in the direction his little boys tiny finger was pointing to see a rack of bras in the clothing section behind him.

"No buddy, that's just a bra. You shouldn't tease daddy like that." Damon grinned.

Man his kid was smart. And just like him.

The end

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Reviews = love


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